The Power of NICE

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The Power of Nice

I am not a nice person by nature, in fact, sometimes describe myself as "perpetually pissed off". I once asked my mother, "When did I become to angry?" And her reply was, "You were born this way." It isn't that I am mean, I have a matter-a-fact attitude and I don't like to beat around the bush. I am incredibly sincere and honest and I always believed that was more important than being nice.

Angry Leyla


If you're reading this and you've met me in the past few years, you may be thinking, "What is she talking about, she's always nice to me." That is because I've done a lot to change. I learned the Power of Nice.

The recession had a life changing impact on me and everything I do. It changed my outlook on many things including how I treat others. I've written a few blog posts on my experiences and observations regarding the recession. I had a feel-good experience with the recession. I found myself surrounded by people who had a "We're all in this together" attitude. People who helped each other in any way they could.

During the recession, I had more time on my hands and I was able to help people and do things for others. When it comes to favors, I have a rule - never do anything for anyone expecting something in return. I found myself getting repaid many times over, the nicer I was to others, the more they wanted to support and help me.

Smiling Leyla with a baby



Here are some of my learnings, some things that help me stay positive and be nice, take from this what you will. Let me get a little Deepak Chopra on you now.

• Smile. Remember, I said I used to describe myself as perpetually pissed off? Almost daily someone would walk up to me and say, "You need to smile more." This made me want to punch the strangers who approached me in the face. No one says that to me anymore. I smile all the time. It may sound trivial but a smile makes a huge difference on your outlook. (Let's hope I am still smiling in February, in the dead of another Chicago winter)
• Wake up early. This is a tough one for me because I am a sleeper. I need a minimum of 8 hours to be fully rested and I can easily go for up to 13 hours of uninterrupted sleep. If you're going to wake up early, you should probably also go to bed early. I just feel so good when I am up and tackle the day before the craziness of the phone and emails starts.
• Exercise. I don't get as much exercise as I should but when I start my day with a run or a long walk on the lake, my thoughts become organized and my thinking is more clear throughout the day. My brightest ideas come to me when I am running, it is my meditation. When I am really pushing myself physically, and I have to keep my focus off of dying, my mind goes to a place where I concentrate on struggles or issues I am dealing with in my work life. Exercise also gives you a sense of accomplishment and you feel good so you're happier and nicer!

• The best revenge is living well.

  If someone is really horrible to you, think about it this way - they're probably just horrible and it would suck to be them. Stick to being nice, getting caught up in the drama of nasty people will only bring you down and keep you from achieving any sort of satisfaction or goal.
  

Related Posts:

Dear Recession of 2009, Thank You For The Lessons Learned

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Related Readings:

The Power of Nice: How to Conquer the Business World With Kindness

The Power of Nice

Keep Your Ego in Check - Don't Let Your Fake, Celebrity Status Get The Best of You

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Please accept this as a rant...

I have lived in Chicago nearly my whole life, I started going to nightclubs at 17, which puts me in my first nightclub in Chicago in the late 80s. That's a long time. I've seen a lot of people come and go in and out of the Chicago nightclub "scene" (whatever that means). I managed to make a lot of friends in and around the bar and restaurant industry. Some who are more successful than others.

I grew up, went away to college, moved back to Chicago and started working in advertising. I worked for some large firms on some major accounts. There, I made friends who are senior executives that worked on some of the biggest accounts in Chicago. After my stint in the agency world, I worked for a professional services firm where I managed C-level executives. I met several CEOs who ran Fortune 500 companies and investors who helped fund those businesses.

Aside from that, I've met two United States Presidents (one while he was a Senator and the other post-White House). Along the way, I've hung out with a few sports stars and TV personalities. I've traveled around the world, been to over twenty countries. I saw Carmen in the opera house in Vienna and Nirvana play at the Metro.

I have a point to make...I'm not being snooty
What I am trying to express here is that I've been around and I have seen a lot of different things in a lot of different places and I met people who are justifiably important. I am NOT saying that makes me important, on the contrary. Most of the really interesting people I've met never needed to tell me how interesting or important they were. I knew it just by being in their presence.

I have met many others who have an over-inflated sense of self but I can honestly say that I've never seen anything like the self-proclaimed Social Media Celebrity. Who are these people? What have they done? So you put a camera to your face and posted a bunch of pictures and wrote a few sentences? Who cares.

Just because you may have a couple thousand followers on Twitter or Facebook does not make you important. It probably means you have too much time on your hands. Don't call yourself a "Major Player". Major player in what? What does that even mean? Stop gloating about inconsequential things.

The fake, internet, pseudo celebrity who fancy themselves as someone who deserves to be treated differently than others is terribly annoying to me. I hold a higher regard for Jared, the Subway guy who lost all that weight. Or Omarrosa from the Apprentice. Andy Warhol, are you rolling over yet?


A side note: I do have friends who are "Internet Celebrities" and most of them are truly humble and nice people. Many started out as something where they were in the public eye in another medium and the internet was the progression. These people also have other jobs where this "celebrity status" helps their business or work and it is not what makes them.


Related Post:
Self Promotion Takes Some Getting Used To (But I Still Hate It)


Related readings:
Self-Promotion for Introverts: The Quiet Guide to Getting Ahead

STAR POWER: Internet Celebrity: Successful Advertising, Marketing and Promoting to the Entertainment Industry on the Internet

Understanding Media: Inside Celebrity

My Visit to the Howard Stern Studio at Sirius XM

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If you know me at all, you know that I love Howard Stern. I've been a fan for many years and I am a Sirius subscriber. My friends say that all of my stories lead to Howard Stern, which is partially true. Howard and I share beliefs on many subject matters. I believe that women who choose to exploit themselves for financial gain, should be welcome to do so, and I may mock them if they decide to put themselves out there in that fashion. I have many reasons for loving Howard that I simply cannot cover in one blog post but mostly it is because he is a good man and a funny man and a man I can relate to.

I arrived in New York on Sunday morning for the Affiliate Summit (East Coast) and I have been checking in here and there in NYC. Last night, I received a tweet from @jimimcclure that said, "Are you in NY?" And I couldn't believe I had forgotten to tell him that I was coming to NY! My brain was so loaded with thoughts about FIJI Water Urban Hunt that I completed blanked on New York.

Jim could only work in a quick tour of the station but that was OK by me. I am eternally grateful for the behind the scenes perspective of the Stern Show.

I just wanted to share this really exciting moment in my life with you all. I am a HUGE Stern fan and being able to visit the show and meet Jim, Richard Christy, Lisa G., Jon Hein and everyone else was a really big deal for me. If you knew me back in '04 when I almost made it on that really big Reality TV show, you know my WHOLE goal to get on the show was because Howard was interviewing the contestants that were kicked off.

Here are my pics! From Sirius XM Studio and the Howard Stern Show!

Arriving at the Sirius XM Building



Meeting Jim McClure (aka Nic Cage)



The Howard TV Control Room


JD's Office - Love the "Wake Richard Christy" Note




I Got to Meet Sal and (my hero) Richard Christy




They Even Wore Their Bababooey and Their Ronnie Masks For Me




I Met The Whole Crew




What an amazing experience! Yay for Jim McClure and the Howard Stern Show staff! Love you love you!

Oh...and Ashley from Chicago was there too! She Miss Howard TV for September and we met on Twitter last week. It was kind of weird getting to meet her.


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