Sunday Morning Soliloquy - Musings of an Urbanite: Dummies

Wednesday, June 24, 2009


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This past weekend I went out with a friend, a male friend, and a small group of his co-workers. I met them at a hot, new, trendy bar that is frequented by a younger, (IMO) unsophisticated crowd. We sat on their rooftop lounge and indulged in "bottle service" drinking vodka poured by scantily clad waitresses who flirted with the multiple men whose company I shared.

My friend, we shall call him Manuel for the purpose of this blog entry, took a liking to the hot blond with giant fake boobs sitting at our table. She was from the south side of Chicago, likely a city-worker's daughter, lived at home with her parents and did not have a job. Manuel was smitten, he looked into his blond lovely's eyes longingly and did his best not to drool on himself.

As Manuel moved in closer to his buxom babe, he busted out the ace-in-the-hole, his business card. He works in finance and his title is "President" not too difficult for even the dumbest of dummies to figure out that you're "kind of a big deal" if your title is "President". Manuel's company is a limited liability corporation, this information will be useful to you when reading the next paragraph.

I sat opposite Manuel as his conversation continued. I couldn't quite make out what they were talking about until I heard the shriek that made my night, my whole weekend perhaps. Moments after Manuel handed his business card to Tits Magee, she looked at the card, absorbed the type and then exclaimed with the greatest furor "Oh my god! You have an LLC? I LOVE LLC's".

No one else heard this explicit display of intelligence but me and Manuel. I then listened while he explained to her that it stood for Limited Liability Corporation. I turned to Manuel's friend and notified him that we were in the presence of intellectual greatness - then we laughed and laughed. All in all, it turned out to be a pretty good weekend and now I am left with yet another awesome story to share.

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